Time Doth Softly, Sweetly Glide...

All the cribs are officially gone at our house! Well, one technically is still being used as a toddler bed but we have definitely moved on to the next stage...big kid beds and all the joys that come along with them. For the most part, transitioning to big kid beds has been really positive for the trio. Since everyone has their own bed, we've actually started having some individual reading time 25 minutes prior to bedtime. Each kid has a lamp and gets to sit on their beds and read. This gives Clark and I a chance to go into each room, read a book or two with each child, say individual prayers with each child, and sing a song. It's quite the process but I think the kids enjoy it just as much as we do.  We still need to paint or stain the beds but we're going to wait on that until we actually use them as bunk beds.

Of course big beds come with some big steps toward independence. We CANNOT help anyone up into their bed or else the whole process has to start over again. Let's just say it's really long to begin with. I try to keep my cool as each child climbs slower than molasses into their beds and creeps toward their pillows but I admit there are nights where I start to lose patience and get upset with the shenanigans. That's pretty much the case with everything we do now. I can't assist them in much of anything without them getting upset that I'm interfering. If I put a sock on, they've got to take it off, try to put it on themselves, then resort to asking me for help when all is said and done. Most parenting books say to plan extra time into the day for this new found independence but holy cow, sometimes I feel if I make one wrong move with these kids I can set off huge temper tantrums. Heaven forbid I try to help put their bibs on, pull a shoe off, or take a book out of a basket. Yeesh! Of course we give them lots of choices and options to try and get things moving but I've just learned that if I want them to do something, I'll ask them if they want me to do it. The answer is always an emphatic NO but then they are focused on the task and it gets done. The worst is car seats. I can't help them into the car or into their seats. I rarely can help bring the straps around their arms and they all insist on doing the easier part of the harness. This process has taken up to 25 minutes before. It's been a delicate balancing act  between allowing them the freedom they need but still exerting our authority on matters so they know that ultimately, mom and dad still control the show.

Enough of that.  A few weekends ago we headed an hour north of the metroplex to get away for the day.  We planned to build a fire, hike around, and possibly play in the water.  Eisenhower State Park is beautiful and the day could not have been nicer.  We bought all the kids some camping chairs so they could have somewhere to sit around the fire.  I told Caleb to smile to show off his chair and this is what I got...

Zachary spent time amongst the weeds and flowers and picked me a beautiful bouquet which he subsequently smashed into the cup holder of his camping chair.  He LOVED sitting and picking flowers.  It was so funny cause usually he's running around.

Once we got set up, we decided to go for a nature walk and happened to end up at this awesome, sandy beach.  We were not prepared with any of our water gear but the kids were so anxious to get in the water.  So Clark ran back to our picnic area while we did our ghetto thing and stripped down to diapers.  Not one of our finest moments as a family since everyone else there was totally decked out with toys, swimsuits, shoes, etc... but whatever.  On the walk back to our picnic area, Zachary AND Leah decided to take off their clothes in the middle of the street because they were so wet.  Plus no one had shoes on.  We looked like a hot mess as a family.  Oh well.  The kids LOVED the water although they didn't venture far.  We will definitely be going back.

After getting all the sand off and changing into dry clothes, we cooked some hot dogs and learned some valuable lessons in the art of camping.  Like not to use DuraFlame logs and to actually bring plates and silverware.  It was pretty chaotic for a bit but the kids were so good while we figured out the fire.  They all sat on the blanket and chowed down on watermelon and chips.  All of which Caleb threw up in the middle of the night.  His eyes are bigger than his stomach (just like Clark...Red Vines??) and because we weren't paying that much attention, I'm pretty sure he ate half the bag of chips and a quarter of a watermelon.  They all weren't hardly hungry by the time hot dogs came around but s'mores were a different story.  Caleb had about three of those too.  Poor guy.  Totally overindulged.  He also took a nose dive off the picnic table and hit his head really hard.  That could've contributed to the whole vomiting in the night.  I don't know.  They are all still talking about the marshmallows and how we cooked them so I think they had fun.  We've discovered that Zachary is a chocolate fiend and Leah absolutely despises it! 

So day camping was fun and the kids have enjoyed their chairs since.  Hauling them around the house for different activities and even eating some meals outside in them.  Let's hope they hold up for a couple years.

I always get a crack out of the fact that they love to wear glasses.  I can't imagine what people think when we're out walking and they see these three chillin' in their shades.  What sets it over the top is that Leah's are Velcro and go around her head.  Love it.

We have been reading Maisy books for the past year and the kids have enjoyed them all. They love all of Maisy's friends and talk about them frequently while playing.  They received a Maisy matching game for Christmas and some Maisy episodes to watch which have also been well-loved.  They are starting to lose interest now since the books are pretty basic but when I saw Maisy was going to visit the library, I knew we had to be there!  I also knew that although the kids said they were excited, they were going to be TOTALLY freaked out by a real life Maisy.  I had little to no expectations going in which, I believe, made for a fun time.  There were some Maisy stories and a video before Maisy arrived and the kids enjoyed that. 

Then the big moment arrived....

and this is how they all looked...

Oh man.  I was laughing and got some video of their fearful reactions.  They acted the same way with a life-sized Easter bunny and Santa Clause so it is what it is.  There was a little craft that we grabbed and decided to do at home.  Panda is Maisy's bear and the kids loved putting their own Panda puppets together.  They are always so patient with crafts like this because I have to do all the gluing and they just sit and watch until it's their turn.  Those are the times I wish I had a few extra arms attached.

We attended another library activity that was a puppet show of a book the kids like.  The puppet show was totally disappointing and boring but there was a cute Mother's Day craft that was handed out.  We did it right there on the floor and the kids loved it.  The craft was tissue paper and a sticky craft paper in the shape of a flower.  Each kid had their own bag and pulled the tissue paper out very purposefully and carefully to stick on the flower.  It was fun to watch.  Sadly, they all said their flowers were for Dad so I totally got jipped on getting a flower.

However, I wasn't worried because Clark built me wonderful flower boxes equipped with a sitting bench in between.  Each child chose their favorite flower for me and Clark filled in the rest with white and yellow flowers (wish I knew their names).  Considering we have killed EVERYTHING we have planted in our yard, the flowers are doing remarkebly well!  I've made a special effort, because studies say so, to touch the flowers and talk to them while I water them.  We'll see if it makes a difference.  I am determined to keep them all alive because it is just so pretty back there with all the colors and I can see Clark's love and effort in the project.

Mother's Day was pretty terrific this year.  Besides the flowers, Leah and I painted our nails for the first time, I received chocolate covered strawberries from a Young Woman fundraiser at church, I got to sit through Sacrament meeting by myself (this was really by default because all the kids were sick), and Saturday night I stayed the night at a hotel by myself!!  This sickness has hit our whole family and Clark has recently been gone for a week out of the country.  There has been lots of crying in the night, midnight dirty diapers, and visits to the bathroom for Zachary.  To top it off, our neighbor is temporarily watching her sister's dogs that bark up until 11pm some nights.  I felt just as sleep deprived as I did when the kids were first born.  I needed a night of uninterrupted sleep.  A night where I didn't wake up in a panic because someone was screaming.  A night where 630am would come and I would just keep on sleeping.  I actually got the idea from a motherhood book a couple years ago but had never thought twice about it until the week before Mother's Day this year.  In fact I couldn't stop thinking about it so I told Clark, if possible, we should make it happen. And we did.  It was great.  Might be a yearly tradition.  :)

Basically Clark out did himself this year so I am feeling the pressure for Father's Day!  He deserves some special treatment so I'll see what I can come up with.

His business trip to Brazil was a bit stressful because we couldn't contact each other easily but he had a great time so it was worth it.  Surprisingly I had a GREAT week with the kids while he was gone.  I think mentally I knew I didn't have any help so I had to be on my A game.  Time passed quickly, the kids were SO well-behaved, and I really don't remember feeling any tension or stress the entire time.  I truly believe it was a tender mercy from Heavenly Father because our lives are not usually like that.  You know, some days time can seem to move so slowly with the kids and me trying to find ways to entertain them.  But while Clark was gone, there would be some afternoons where I'd sit on the floor to play with them and all the sudden two hours had passed.  Truly a blessing.

I was driving home from church on Sunday singing "Love at Home" because it was the closing song in Relief Society.  I sang the line, "time doth softly, sweetly glide, when there's love at home."  I couldn't believe I'd never noticed that line before because it rang so true to me at that moment.  Time can be painfully slow and the days painfully long sometimes as a mother of toddlers, but those are the days I'm impatient, annoyed, distracted, etc...  Time really can sweetly and softly glide if I just choose to share more laughter, smiles, and love with the kids.  They make my world incredible and if I just let myself be WITH them in their world, the clock is irrelevant.

Mother's Day 2013 is certainly one to be remembered.  

Crazy is Our Middle Name...

Yesterday I gave my lesson in Relief Society so now I feel like I can finally sit down at the computer and think about something else. Uploaded all my pictures, organized and trimmed my videos, and now here I am ready to write!

The trio are at such a funny stage. They make up the weirdest stuff and laugh at each other. The thing lately is to make up names such as Deedee, Gaka, Booka, Deega, Moomi, Gigwag, etc... Then one of them will say, for instance, that Caleb's name is Gigwag, and Caleb (or whoever else is being targeted) gets super mad and insists his name is Cabee Baby. If Zachary is the victim, he gets even more mad and screams that his name is not Moomi it's Brian Zachy Back! Leah doesn't get mad rather super emotional and through her tears says her name is not Booka it's Eah Ree (Leah Marie). Anyway, it's a really funny game at first because of all the random names they come up with but eventually everyone is screaming, laughing, yelling, and crying all at the same time. My poor kids never know what to expect from me either because sometimes I laugh and try to tease the situation away.  Other times I'm annoyed at all the noise and I react harshly. I'm working on consistency, believe me.

Holy cow though, they fight about EVERYTHING. Who gets dressed first, who has a dirty diaper, who ate the best, who shuts the door, who gets the dump truck, who gets out of the tub first, who empties the dryer, who vacuums, who counts the fastest, who says the alphabet the loudest, who gets to sing Twinkle Twinkle, who gets to choose a book first, etc... Because they are all at the same developmental stage, no solution is acceptable to all three.   I can't reason with an older child to wait their turn or sing more quietly. They are all emotional and illogical. Further, they all constantly want our approval and attention and don't really care if they hurt the others' feelings in the process. For example, they are always more than happy to share with me or Clark but share with each other? NO WAY. Not happening. They'd rather spend the day in timeout than do that. We checked out seven toddler discipline/behavior books at the library and are doing our best to minimize the damage during this stage but it's not pretty. I've pretty much stopped doing playdates (with a couple exceptions) because playing in our own home and doing the best we can to stay out of each others' way is challenging enough. Add two to three more toddlers who have the same attitudes and toddlerisms and I'm just exhausted and frustrated after it's over. However, along with the bad comes some good.  They talk and sing and run and dance and live life to the fullest. That's a great thing about toddlers. They live to have fun.

I had a little fun for myself at the end of last month. I boarded a plane and headed west to meet up with all my sisters and mom for a weekend away. I always feel strange by myself and keep looking around because someone just HAS to be looking at me. Nope. No one takes a second look when I'm not pulling a choo choo wagon and a shopping cart. I'm just another person minding my business and reading a book. I lose my identity a bit but it's kind of refreshing. The first thing I did when I landed was get picked up by my sister Emily and head to Cafe Rio. Oh yum yum yum. I ate there again at the airport when a flew out three days later. Had to get my fill!!

We stayed in SLC that night, ran on the treadmills the next morning (much to Emily's dismay, she'd rather run outside), and waited for everyone else to arrive around 11am. If there is one thing my sisters like to do, it's shop. We shopped all afternoon Friday and most of the day Saturday. HOWEVER, I actually bought a few things! This is a monumental event in my life. All my family pressures me to shop and purchase and I never do. At one point I think my mom threatened me if I didn't buy something. ;) Let me tell you, shop and purchase I did! We stopped at DSW and everyone came out with one or two bags. I bought some Croc flip flops which are incredibly comfortable. So there you go. Later in the day I bought some new blouses for church. My body just isn't the same after triplets so my wardrobe is in desperate need of a make over. So this is my start I guess.

Everyone wanted to eat at Cheesecake Factory since there isn't one in Idaho.  After a full day of shopping I was happy to sit and enjoy some Thai Lettuce Wraps.  My oldest sister brought her oldest daughter who is actually only 8 1/2 years younger than me.  Closer in age than I am to her mom.  Funny how those things happen.  She fit right in though! 

Whenever the kids see a picture of Emily, they always yell, "mama!!!"  We do look a little alike I suppose. 

Our first night all together we stayed in a two-bedroom suite, ate delicious sandwiches that my mom packed and prepared, engaged in crafting and painting a cute letter to go in our homes, and watched a movie to end the night.  It only took an hour and a half to get the movie to work but we did it!

We also went to see The Host and enjoyed that.  Some of my sisters had mixed feelings but since I had read the book, I knew what to expect and knew it was going to be slooooow moving.  I'd see it again though!  I had a great time and felt super refreshed coming home to the kids.  The kids and Clark came into the airport to surprise me when I came out of the gate but unfortunately I came out another door and didn't locate them for about five minutes.  Bummer.  The kids acted like I had just stepped around the corner for a minute and hadn't been gone for a few days.  They acted totally calm and normal.  Made me laugh.

Because I was so rejuvenated after returning from our trip, when Zachary asked me on Monday if he could wear his Buzz Lightyear underwear I said, "sure! why not?"  When usually I'd say, "when you learn to use the potty you can wear underwear."  After a few big accidents, luckily on the tile floor, he was pretty much potty trained!!!!  I can't believe all the drama I went through with Leah.  I may have to endure it again but holy cow, I think potty training should always be like this!  Although Zachary is stubborn and gives me grief most of the day, he took to this task like a champ.  It suited his personality, his perfectionism, and was a great experience for him because it was positive!  There was lots of praise and kisses and positivity and I realized that I don't give much of that to him because he pushes my buttons.  It showed me how a little positivity can go a long way.  The first week of potty training he was so well-behaved and happy.  He was totally ready and it was something good we needed to do together.  So I'm thrilled to be able to say ONE DOWN!  TWO TO GO!  Here he is after the first time he went #2 in the potty...

Sometimes I'll forget to ask if he needs to go or remind him to use the potty and soon enough he comes running around the corner with the bucket of pee saying he went!  Luckily he's pretty careful as he runs around the house with it.  He listens to his body and has no problems going in alone and getting things done.  Awesome.

Since he's potty trained, we've experienced the dreaded night time potty visits.  We always have to take his crying seriously now because (although he's wearing a Pull-up) he panics when he wakes up and has to pee.  So much so that he's starting crawling out of his crib.  Never been done before.  It's definitely a scary thing when doors start opening and shutting in the night and you believe all your kids are safely in their cribs.  Yikes!  Point is, it's time for some big beds.  We've taken a liking to an unfinished wood store near our home.  We've bought some other furniture pieces there and thought bunk beds would be great to get there as well.  So that's what we did!  The boys won't actually use the bunk beds right now but we've set up one bed for Zachary and he was thrilled!  Leah cried herself to sleep the first night he had his bed because she wanted to be in there with him.  This picture was right outside the Woodland store.  The kids sat on a rocker and ate some fruit snacks.  Doesn't get any better!

The kids are really into Toy Story and Finding Nemo right now.  They've entertained several other movies like Happy Feet, Monsters Inc, and Ratatouille but none have come close to the first two.  They've pretty much left Elmo in the dust and hardly remember who he is anymore.  The army men in Toy Story are a funny fascination for the trio, especially Zachary so we bought a dollar bag of army men and set up a battle zone.  We had a hospital, cafeteria, bunkers, catapults, and sleeping quarters.  They loved it.

More army men hanging with Leah.  Unfortunately for them I think they were all lining up to go to the grocery store.

They are also really into playing doctor which has helped to an extent when we've had to go to the real doctor.  They bring their tools and aren't quite so frightened to have their hearts and lungs listened to.

Leah is really into pulling her pants high...no clue.

and lastly they are totally into playing in the sandbox.  They love going out there and filling and dumping their buckets.  I've loosened up about how often they play in there and would actually allow them to do it everyday if weather permitted.  The reason why is because I've figured out how to keep the sand out of the house.  When they are done playing, I strip them down and let them run circles in the backyard while I shake all the clothes out.  This way their feet are getting clean in the grass, sand is falling off them, and by the time we go inside (straight to the bath), there's hardly any sand in sight.  While I was shaking clothes off, I came around the corner to find them all trying to sit in one choo choo wagon...naked.  Clark thinks I should delete this picture but I promised him it was their own doing and they thought it was great.  I'll decide later if it will go into the permanent blog book.

Our World Aquarium season passes expired last month so I finally was able to try out another aquarium downtown.  It's significantly less expensive and significantly smaller.  Maybe 1/10 the size of the World Aquarium.  Other moms who have gone says it great though because no one is ever there and you could spend at least an hour just letting the kids run around and looking at the five exhibits.  Unfortunately when I pulled up, there were about 18 bus fulls of kids going into the aquarium for a field trip.  Ugh!  I had already driven 30 minutes so I wasn't turning back but I hate situations like that because I can't pull the wagon and it's more nerve-racking to keep track of the kids.  I decided to just do it since we were already there.  The aquarium had two memorable features that the kids are still talking about so I guess it was worth it:  a hands-on sting ray exhibit and a Finding Nemo exhibit.  It was pushing and shoving room only though to see those two things.  The picture below is the seahorse exhibit.  No pushing or shoving here. 

Last but not least, we took advantage of the summer-like weather this past weekend and went on a nature walk.  Not much nature to see around these parts but there is a small wildlife reserve a few miles away so we headed there.  Not before everyone was fully equipped with sunglasses and homemade binoculars (made from toilet paper rolls, paper, tape, and yarn.  I was one roll short so I had to unravel the whole thing to get it out.  All the while instructing the kids never to do what I was doing ;) Watch out for this bunch!  They are on a mission to spot some bugs and birds with their 'noculas.'

Like I've said before, Caleb is full to the brim of passion.  Doesn't matter what it is, he's passionately involved.  Searching for wildlife through binoculars was no exception.  The other two lost interest after a while but Caleb was going strong.  Even going as far as hiding in the tall grass to see what he could spy.

After our walk we stopped in for pizza and ate it right there in the car.  By the time we got home, dinner was done and everyone was exhausted.  Perfect recipe for a stress-free bedtime and good night sleep.  Zachary even slept the whole night without any potty calls.  Pretty miraculous.

I have no words or description for this last picture other than these three make us crazy...

but we sure are crazy about them.

Moments of March...

Many times I pull out the camera to 'quickly' take a picture of something the kids are doing. Then I realize they weren't all looking so I take another, then I realize the lighting was bad so I take another, then I realize my camera didn't flash so I take another, then I realize Caleb's eyes were closed so I take another...ahhhhh! By the end of all this, I've spent 15 minutes trying to get ONE picture and I'm usually annoyed, sweating, and yelling at the kids because they aren't cooperating.

So I challenged myself to really only take ONE picture.  If Clark was taking the picture he was happy to oblige to my challenge because his biggest pet peeve is taking pictures over and over and over again with me analyzing them between each attempt.  I had to make sure I was positioned properly, lights were on, flash was working, etc... Then I got one click (I mean, this is how it was with the old film cameras. You took a picture and crossed your fingers that it would turn out when you had the film developed.  It was the worst when you got pictures back and your finger was covering the lens). Of course after snapping a picture I immediately looked to see if it was a good one and found 20 things I didn't like about it. It was so tempting to delete it and try again but I really wanted to just capture the moments, as dirty or blurry or chaotic as they were, and not worry about the little details.

The pictures I'm posting don't seem too exciting but I love looking at them knowing exactly what was happening in that moment even if everyone wasn't looking. I also love knowing that after one click, I set the camera down and went back to playing with the kids...no yelling or sweating involved.

FYI:  The kids are pointing to Tennessee on the map because Clark was there on a business trip.  So they learned all about that state.  :)

 

The Dreaded Potty...

Potty training attempt number one has come and gone. 

I'm the type of person that when I get an idea in my head, I can't sit on it. I have to carry it through right away. Even if it's returning something to the store, which I know can be done at anytime, I still feel urgency and get in the car as soon as possible.  We were planning on working with Leah in a few weeks but a friend emailed the 'Lora Jensen 3 Day Method' for potty training and I was totally convinced to do it right away. So I went out the next day and got all the stuff and started.

The whole premise of the method is that if your child is over 22 months old, they are trainable and will be fully trained in three days if you follow the method EXACTLY. You throw all your diapers away and never turn back.  Not even for naps or bedtime.  Another important premise of the method is no sitting on the potty for long periods of time to 'try' and not asking them if they need to go.  Therefore handing over control to them.  The author said that kids want to be in control of these situations. I mean, this method has been featured on Good Morning America and has rave reviews.  I was totally on board. You basically keep your child right by your side for three days and rush them to the bathroom every time they are in the middle of an accident. I knew this method was right up my alley since I'm pretty obsessive compulsive and don't do anything casually. I was geared up and ready to follow Leah around(much to her annoyance). What I didn't realize, however, is that each time I was rushing Leah to the bathroom it was like a panic/startling experience for her which is definitely not up her alley. I tried to remain calm and positive even though it was a messy ordeal but even with some reassurance, it was still startling.  She likes plans, schedules, preparation, advance warning etc...

The first day she tolerated these panic attacks and the second day she was totally resistant.  She did not want to leave her toys (for good reason...being a multiple means hold on to your stuff or lose it) or what she was playing with just to go pee.  The second morning she held her pee for almost four hours!!  I kept talking to her and following my guidelines...letting her run the show and taking control.   But let's be honest, when have my kids EVER had control in their short little lives.  All the sudden Leah gets a little power and let me tell you, she ran with it.  Not only was she resisting the training, she was refusing to take naps or go to sleep, she was being defiant and disobedient, and was SOOOOOO emotional, especially before bedtime.  Clark said he didn't realize how emotional potty training was going to be!  Neither did I. The book said you should not discipline or scold your child during potty training.  It should be a happy experience.  However, I think that's why she starting acting out!  She had control and no consequences.

We were kind of excited to train one kid at a time because that hasn't really been a luxury for us.  Do something with the first kid, learn from it, and change/adapt for the next.  We have one chance to do everything because all the kids are in the same stage at the same time.  So with potty training, we always thought we'd do them all together but like the idea of having a second chance if something didn't work.  Boy it did not work.  I think a lot of it was I had NO idea what to expect.  I was not prepared emotionally or physically for how challenging this process is.  Of course I romanticized it a little and said our kids will be potty trained in three days, no problem! By day five at 3pm, Leah had one success out of eight.  I think percentages should be a bit higher at that point especially after using the Lora Jensen method.  So I gave her a bath, put the potty away, and put her back in diapers.  I have never been so relieved to see a diaper on her again!  Yeah maybe five days was too early to quit but again, I could not have imagined doing another day of all the drama and clean up.  Leah never even asked about her underwear, stickers, treats (she was bribed with freeze-dried strawberries since she refuses to eat any candy), or the potty.  It was like it never happened.  So weird.

Another big thing we learned about Leah is that although she loves to be a leader, show everyone how to do things, and be involved in everything, she does not like to be a pioneer.  She doesn't like to be the first to try something or do it alone.  She is a social creature as most girls are but I saw how it affected her potty training.  It would have been so much more exciting for her if one of her brothers was doing it with her, running to the bathroom, celebrating, etc...  That's how her whole life has been.  Doing everything with her brothers.  I think she felt isolated and pressured which may have been the reason for all the emotions.

Anyway, I'm probably reading way far into all this but for a two-year-old, this is a huge change.  So I had to swallow my pride and say it wasn't working.  I don't know if it was the method, personality, or social aspect for her, but I do know I'll be much more mentally prepared to follow through and stick it out next time.  And I will definitely NOT be doing away with discipline during the process.  That was a mistake.  Just have to find out what works for her.

What a little bugger.

Does anyone out there have a child like Leah and used a potty training method that worked?