Surprise! You're Having Triplets!

March 3rd: The day we received the most unexpected news which would change our lives forever. This is the day, last year, that we found out we were having three babies.

It seems that through my reading of blogs and associations with other multiple moms that we all have very similar experiences and emotions after finding out; that the 'day' will be forever vivid in our minds. I remember our 'day' like it was yesterday.

A couple weeks prior to the 'day' I had been feeling slightly sick, no throwing up, but had a lot of abdominal tenderness. I went to the doctor to have a blood test done to detect a possible pregnancy. The doctor called me later that evening to confirm my suspicions that I was indeed pregnant. My day 13 HCG level was around 160 mIU/ml. He said that was a bit high but nothing unusual. Although uncertain, he suspected more than one fetus but said lots of women sometimes have high HCG levels with just one. I went back to the doctor two days later to do a repeat blood test. This time to make sure the pregnancy had really stuck. My levels were now around 420 mIU/ml! Typically the HCG hormone doubles every 48 hours once pregnant. Mine had more than doubled and was already high to begin with. My pregnancy was a definite positive at this point. Doctor said congrats and I planned to see him in a few weeks for an ultrasound.

I honestly don't remember the next couple weeks leading up to my ultrasound other than I got sicker and sicker by the second. I was also becoming increasingly nervous about my doctor commenting that there might be more than one in there. Of course I shrugged those thoughts aside and believed I'd have a regular, complication-free pregnancy resulting in one healthy baby.

So the morning of my ultrasound arrived. I was taken into the sonogram room very quickly but waited for the nurse for almost 30 minutes!! I was so anxious. At this point I had convinced myself I was having twins because of how sick I felt. Double the hormones right? That makes sense. The nurse came in and started the sonogram.

There it was.

One little sac with a strong heartbeat. It was incredible that a little human had been created and was starting to grow. Then the nurse excitedly announced there was a second sac with a heartbeat! "Congrats! You have twins!" were her words. I said thanks but kept staring at the screen because while she was looking at me lending her congratulations, her hand had moved.

I had seen it. The third sac. She saw my face and asked, "aren't you excited about your two babies?" I told her to look at the screen and pointed at what I saw.


Then she was silent. She was no longer offering congratulations. At this point I knew she was checking to make sure she wasn't looking at one of the first two sacs, just at a different angle. Still silent. My heart was beating out of my chest at this point. I asked if it was a third sac and she finally answered and carefully said yes. In situations like mine, doctors/nurses are VERY careful to declare things before knowing for sure. However, there was indeed a third heartbeat. Ok....this is a joke right? This only happens to OTHER people. Not me. I laid my head back on the table and covered my face with my hands. Just breathing and thinking. It's amazing what happens to your mind when you find out news like this. It spins a million miles an hour. Then I asked, "can we make sure there are just three?" Don't worry, she started looking and suspected one more sac but couldn't tell!!

Oh gosh.

Again, she was not declaring anything because she wasn't sure. I was only five weeks along at this point so things were hard to see. She said it might just be a pocket of fluid but would have the doctor take a look. Suddenly I was annoyed at her lack of urgency. I wanted her to run out of the room and grab the doctor IMMEDIATELY. She proceeded to shoot the breeze with me talking about a past patient who had quads and all four babies survived; however, that mom was a lot taller than me. Hmmm...that's nice I guess. Didn't know what to say to that. Then she left, I got dressed, and sat there for another 20 minutes! Clark was not there because he had started into a busy time at work. Thinking it would be a regular ultrasound we didn't worry about him coming. So I called him, gave him the news, and he said, "don't joke." I told him I would definitely not joke about something like this. Then the nurse came in so I had to hang up quickly. I can't imagine how he was feeling getting that news then being hung up on.

I went into the Doctor's private office and he said congrats...that I should be excited I was pregnant!! I don't think I replied. He explained that the fourth baby was just fluid but we'd know for sure next week at another ultrasound. Again as other multiple moms can relate, the doctor immediately started talking about fetal reduction (as if it's supposed to make the news less shocking)...reducing the amount of fetuses down to two or even one. Doctors typically recommend this procedure with higher order multiples (three or more) because of all the risk involved for the mom and babies. The actual reduction procedure isn't performed until around 12 weeks because doctors wait for the possibility of the body naturally reducing the number of fetuses on its own. In my case there was a 33% chance of natural reduction, or miscarriage in other words. The doctor kept talking for about 20 minutes and I just got lost in my thoughts. For a moment, reducing became a real possibility because I just wanted all this to be reversed and changed so I was pregnant with just one. So I could just be normal. All the sudden I had lept into a world of high risk and abnormality. All the unknowns, the risk of early delivery, the risk of premature disorders, the risk of bedrest, babies in the NICU, the risk of pretty much ANYTHING! Doctor was still talking. Then I distinctly remember having an overwhelming feeling and thinking, "if my Heavenly Father wants to send us three babies....then I'll do what I can to make that possible."

Decision made. My moment of insecurity had passed and I told the doctor I was not interested in reducing. Even though those calming thoughts kept coming back of this being what God wanted for Clark and me, there was still no feeling of settlement. My mind was reeling. I left the office and on the way out everyone there hugged me. They said congrats but in a consoling kind of way like they really wanted to say, "I'm sorry" as well. I quickly got in the elevator and barely made it out before bursting into tears. These were not tears of anger or sadness. It was just my way of feeling all of that emotion. Being totally blind sided and completely overwhelmed in a matter of minutes. I had a long walk to my car and once inside I locked the doors and just sat there. Not moving. Not crying. Just frozen. This went on for about an hour. I did talk to Clark but I don't remember that conversation. Once I regained composure, the first person I called was my Mom...then my oldest sister. When I told my sister the news she simply said, "well, you'll do great."

Nothing more....just that. I guess that's all you can say to news like mine. So there was no where to go but forward. I actually appreciated what she said and that she didn't get all crazed. It kept me calm and grounded. I went home and, like other newly pregnant women, hung the ultrasound on the fridge. I ignored it though. Just noticed it when opening the fridge door; still in denial that the sonogram picture belonged to me. If I looked at it for too long I would just get all worried about the endless possibilities mentioned earlier. All the hormones weren't helping either. At one point I actually turned the picture around. I got a few more pictures the next week to add to the pile and I think those got stuffed in my purse. The doctor talked about reducing again but I emphatically reminded him we were keeping all three. I got sicker and sicker as the days passed and more overwhelmed at our imminent future. The news didn't get any less shocking over the next eight weeks. We did announce the pregnancy at ten weeks although I was reluctant because of the lingering possibility of miscarriage. People knew something was up though because of my behavior and sickness. It wasn't until about 12 weeks (when I knew all three babies were here to stay) that the reality punched me in the face and I knew we needed to get on the ball with preparation. When the shock finally subsided, excitement and anticipation set in. We had so much to do and I was in no state to do any of it! We got three cribs, prepared the house for my possible bedrest, and started buying diapers. However, just a short ten weeks later, I entered the hospital on strict bedrest and fully realized what type of sacrifice was going to be required to get these babies here.

I think back over and over to this day and all the emotions experienced. I'm still in awe that it happened to us. Then I think of our three sweet miracles and tears fill my eyes because I CANNOT imagine life without them. They all wanted to come together apparently and we just got lucky because we were able to meet three of our angels at once. We thank our Heavenly Father everyday for them and know it is by His hand they they are here in our family. Our 'day' was and still is unforgettable.